worst fear = faced

I think its safe to say that if I asked everyone who knows me what my worst fear is, at least 90% of them would get it right: needles. I hate them. Its not the blood that gets me...its the actual needle piercing through my precious skin. I can watch medical TV shows til my face turns blue (this weekend I did...more on that later) and I can handle their guts being thrown about, organs being transplanted, blood spewing out onto the doctors...but the second they pull out a needle, my eyes are closed.

Needless to say (ironic that i just added one letter to the world "needles" there huh?) anyhow...needless to say I avoid them at all costs.

Last Wednesday I was feeling rather ill, and thought I was getting the flu. Thursday morning I woke up to a 102.5 fever, a HUGE headache that felt like the worst hangover in the world, a stomach ache, a constant need to go to the bathroom, and an inability to stand up longer than 3-5 seconds. Austin encouraged me against my will to go to the Urgent Care facility (my dr. was full for the day) We sat in the waiting room a long time where I fought the urge to lay on the germ-infested carpet (that's how painful sitting up was!) and I was finally called back. Ok - so really I only waited 45 minutes...but it felt like hours. The doctor asked a lot of questions to which I mumbled answers, then he quickly diagnosed me with gastroenteritis. don't ask me if that spelling is correct. so, quick diagnosis, that's good. remedy? uh oh.

"We're going to give you a couple prescriptions for the various symptoms, but we're going to need to get you some fluids because you are severely dehydrated. It shows in your skin and lips, and in the urine sample you gave"

I immediately started shaking. Fluids? That means an IV. I've never had an IV, and hoped to have 4 in my lifetime (4 kids=4 IVs unless i'm blessed with twins) The doctor asks if I have any allergies, and i said "just needles" His quick-witted response? "Well if you like I can get you a benadryl shot for that needle allergy" no thanks doc, no thanks.

So, being the "big girl" I am, I opted out of escaping the facility asap...though I heavily considered it until i realized how slowly "asap" would be at that point.

Boy was I a baby! The nurse came in with her little IV kit and I immediately started shaking. hands trembling, lip quivering, legs shaking, eyes watering - you'd think she was doing brain surgery. I squeezed Austin's hand as I cried...no, bawled...and she did her job. She was the sweetest nurse in the world, but she must have been thinking "this girl is worse than any kid i've ever seen, she's insane!"

immediately after she finished I turned to austin and said "New idea: you have the kids"

2 attemps and 10 minutes later, fluids were dripping and freezing my arm off. My mom believes, and I don't argue, that my needle fear is more of a psychological connection to seeing my dad hooked up to so many IVs and being pricked with so many needles during his illness. That may be true...and I like that reasoning better than me being a 23 year old who literally can't sit still when being poked with a little needle smaller than a pen point.

So...after 5 hours I left and went home to start watching season 1 of grey's anatomy. it was hard, seeing as i'd fall in and out of consciousness all day. but...i'm proud to say that over the course of the 3 days that i was out of my back, and the 4th day where i was up and down all day, i did manage to complete both the first and second seasons of Grey's Anatomy. I'm now a whiz.

And on that note, I better get back to work. Or to starbucks...it is 25 degrees outside, after all, and I did eat a total of about 6 meals in the last 5 days...so I think I am in need of a white chocolate mocha.